The Pleas of the Broken Heroine
by LoneAuthoress
Summary: "Kill me." She whispered,shaking with tears and pure anger "If this is how it'll be forever,kill me. If you have the guts,kill me." But no answer. There was never an answer. And there will never be an answer. (OC)


She was a hero, _the_ hero. The one who saved so many lives,the immortal daughter of Poseidon who's done a countless things,making Hercules look like Tantalus. They all talked heroically of her acts,heroically of her bravery,heroically of everything that she's done. But they don't know things about a hero. A hero isn't all brave and strong. A hero starts out as a weak and terrified person. And how do they end? Brave,yet defeated.

But for Penny Jackson,it starts weak,and it ends weak.

Nobody seemed to understand what was wrong,and nobody was brave to pluck the courage and talk to her. She was constantly moping around,yelling at campers for no reason,picking fights,and causing trouble.

She was no longer the one who defeated destruction,she _was_ the destruction.

It's been two years since the War with Gaea,and everyone has been settling,a new generation of campers coming in. Her friends were all happily together,ready for their peaceful futures. And what future did Penny have?

Nothing. Her future was dust-filled and blank. There was nothing in the world that she cared about now. Nothing. Her whole world,her heart,everything belonged to one person,and he was gone,forever.

She should've known from the moment,that when she had regarded those clear blue eyes,they were not to be trusted. She should've known that years later her heart would break. She should've known that she wasn't what a guy wanted. She should've known it all.

And look where it has landed her. Into the land of misery and sorrow,where nothing lives.

As she moped past the strawberry fields,the satyres stopped playing their flutes,the nymphs stopped dancing and laughing,and the campers stopped in motion. All eyes went on her. She felt anger surge through her veins,setting her on fire. Why are all these people happy? Shouldn't they join her,into the invisible lands of discontent? Their expressions were filled with worry and wonder. How could their great heroine just act like an outcast? Shouldn't she be celebrating with them?

She hurried away quickly,avoiding the stares and sudden quietness. They shouldn't be happy. They should be in misery like her,close to death. Nothing should be happy. Nobody should be happy.

She walked over the dunes and sat simply on the cool sand,watching the waves roll in and out calmly,shimmering under the sunset. And he was driving his chariot,without even knowing that she was thinking of him.

How could this be? How could this even happen?

She remembered the day they were forced to end things,right in front of the Gods. It was humiliating and most of all,heart wrenching. She never believed they could be so cruel to her in this way. They promised they'd keep loving each other. He promised that one day,when the war was over,he'd come back to her,and they'd never be separated,ever again.

But the Gods are more cruel than the Fates. She had learnt that the hard way when she finally saw the love of her life,the day after the war. She laughed and smiled at him,her world brightening up,but everything had stopped when he had asked that one question.

 _'Who are you?'_

She remembered how she felt. The ground was disappearing,and so was the happiness in her romantic heart,which was shattering into pieces at the very moment. In his eyes,he saw a mere common demigod,someone whom he had never seen,never loved,never kissed.

She was nothing to him. Nothing.

The world had stopped turning at that moment. She remembered her expression going into curiosity,and then the realisation dawned at her when she saw the satisfied gleam in Zeus's eyes. Daring that this was all a joke,she had turned to her father and Artemis,but they had avoided her eyes. All the gods and goddesses except Zeus avoided the _'How could you do this to me?'_ look that she was shooting at them. She remembered how the pain was crushing her,so she turned and fled,her tears falling fast.

She had turned away from all the Gods. Misery and Sorrow filled her heart. She refused to think about them. After everything she had done, _everything_ ,this was her reward. To be punished. To turn the love of her life against her. She should have joined Gaea's forces when she was given the chance. She could've easily killed everyone,including her own friends. She could've killed Zeus,and had Apollo all to herself. She could've had everything.

But now? She was a soul,a mere soul that was no longer admired,but feared. Her heart had been eaten away by darkness,and that was how her eyes saw everything. Dark.

Nothing was important to her. Death had never looked so interesting to her. If she died,would the pain go away? No. She would sit in Elysium for sure,still with all the memories fresh. All the happy memories...they all seemed like a dream...something she could never reach.

Either way,she can't die. She immortal. If she had a dollar for every time she had cut her wrists,blood leaking out,she would kick King Midas out of business. She could start a business,selling her blood in vials. But as usual,the cuts always closed themselves. She could do no harm to herself.

She missed the beautiful feeling of his fingers through her hair. She missed the feeling of his arms around her. It made her feel indestructible,safe and loved. She felt like the luckiest girl alive. She missed the stupid jokes and flirty comments that she would always roll her eyes at. What would she give just to hear them all again...she missed the beautiful smiles he gave her. She missed running her fingers through his own hair at every time the space closed between them. She missed the quiet talks they had on the beach. She missed the way his nimble fingers fitted with hers perfectly. She missed the heavenly feeling of his lips on hers,moving gracefully like they were designed for each other. He was one puzzle piece,and she was the other.

Together,they were one.

She never appreciated him until now. She never realised how special he was to her. He had held a special place in her heart,and that space was her entire heart. And now that he had left,her heart was no more. It was cold and dark,unable to function. She would give anything to have him back.

Anything.

She felt her tears roll down her cheeks for the umpteenth time,and she did nothing to stop them. What was the use? She didn't want to give what the Gods wanted; they wanted to see her hurt,her powerless. She didn't want to give that satisfaction to them,but it was no use. She was forced to give everything up,even after saving all of their lives. She cried and cried,but she still couldn't get her Sunboy back.

"I want him back." She whispered,the words escaping from her lips. They were like a mantra;she kept repeating it again and again. "I just want him back...please."

But no answer. There was never an answer.

"Please..." She whispered,her visions blurred with all the tears. She hid her face in her palms and started shaking,the cold wind lashing against her,making her exposed,vulnerable and blind. This is what the Gods wanted. To see her in pain. They want to remind her that she was not the most powerful. The reason why they kept her alive was because they needed her to do their work. To save Olympus.

"I want him back. I _need_ him back. Please...I'll do anything."

She needed him or she would be no more. He had to save her before it's too late. She couldn't feel. She couldn't think. She couldn't live like this. How can she?

"Apollo.." She whispered. The cause of her happiness,now the cause of her sadness. Lord Apollo,the God of the Sun,and her love. The one she was to be with forever.

"I love you."

It was no use saying it. He was gone,taken away from her within the blink of an eye. He was now happily dating girls again,not knowing he was the cause for her tears. He was gone,and he couldn't hear her,and never will hear her again. As long as he's happy,she could live. If they hadn't taken away his memory,he would be stuck in the same position as her. For that,she was a bit grateful to the Gods.

"Keep him safe for me. Please."

She didn't know who she was telling that too. Her father? Artemis? But whoever it was,whatever it was,she was absolutely sure that the Gods were listening to her now,except him. She had the chance to curse them,yell at them,even kill them,but no. She chose to plead to keep him safe,make sure he's happy.

She's a selfish person,who wanted him back in her life. But there was still remorse in her cold heart,remorse that nobody could see. All the happy times of them together kept flashing in her mind,unable to break free. They could've taken away her memory too,so she could live happily,but no. They wanted her to suffer. And she was suffering,but that wasn't enough for them.

She pressed her palms on her tear-filled eyes. On a normal day,if she was crying on the beach along,he would always appear behind her. She would turn around,run into his open arms and cry,let loose of everything. Sometimes he would put her to sleep,refusing to rest until he sees her sleeping.

Even Nico Di Angelo,the one who had lost everything,his sister,his mother,was thrown out as an outcast,has now found love. He was at least happy now,with someone by his side. How was she feeling? Jealousy? No. Bitterness. Anger. Nobody is supposed to be happy. The world should be cold and grey,with black as well. There should be no more love,only tears.

How could she escape this? Even if she threw herself into the pits of Tartarus,she wouldn't die. She'd suffer,but wouldn't die. Now,Tartarus seems like Central Park compared to the inner battle she was going through. An endless battle which would tear her apart. And it was already doing just that.

She never bragged about her powers to anyone. She tried to act like a normal demigod,not like an immortal. Unfortunately,the Gods believe she struts around like a supermodel or something. She doesn't,and still doesn't understand why did they do this to her. They could strip her immortality away,throw her into Tartarus,but take away her Sunboy? No.

So that's what they did.

Her skin was more pale,and her eyes,which were permanently red and watery,wore a raw look of anger and destruction,her lips never curving into a smile. Her hair was untidy and messy,and grown more wild over the years. She was more aggressive,with no emotions.

Just heartbreak. Hate. Bitterness. Anger. Death. They all were mere comrades of hers. She just didn't know it..until now.

"Kill me." She whispered,shaking with tears and pure anger "If this is how it'll be forever,kill me. If you have the guts,kill me."

But no answer. There was never an answer. And there will never be an answer.


End file.
